Glad

Glad that Chipz and I are back to bickering and irritating each other. Glad that our friendship is on its way to healing. Glad that at least we don't have to hide in our own holes like that couple of days which were damn frustrating. And that we're both putting in the effort to salvage whatever we had. =)

Glad that Puang was with me throughout all that happened a week back. Glad that I don't have to wake up to that feeling to emptiness. I hate that. Going through the motions of losing someone and missing someone.

The feeling of emptiness whenever you see the places which reminds you of where you've been with that person, knowing that you'll never go there anymore. Or the feeling of despair when someone does something or said something similar to what that person had said or done before, knowing that what had happened would only be memories.

Previously, I couldn't even bear to bring myself to walk pass a Sushi restaurant, which reminded me that I never got around to eating in one with Elv.

I didn't want to walk into another Swensons, which reminded me of how Elv taught me to put tartar sauce in my baked rice.

Then, I couldn't bring myself to go back to CitySpace coz I went there with Ming.

I couldn't bring myself to walk pass the Sci carpark coz that's where Ming always parks.

I'm glad all that's over. Over over over. That I don't have to go through that same kinda feeling. =)

"It's raining men...Hallelujah"

Hurr hurr I wish =p but it's gonna rain real soon

With GH at com lab wasting our time again haha had major laughing fits at lunch just now. Lol shitt I was TRYING to tell the story about this guy who jumped at the MRT tracks at Clementi ytd and got dismembered lah (which is really damn sad by the way) but think its just his face lah lol I started laughing halfway before finishing =p damnit its like Mel telling his story about his dead cousin who drowned.

OOOh I saw this DAMN CUTE toddler ytd. He was walking halfway then he fell. The damn surprising thing was me and my sis both were looking at him expecting him to burst out crying any second but he didn't! He actually got back up on his little feet again and continued walking happily! OMG! Damn cute lah...wanted to hug and pinch him ahahaha. Learn from the toddler, life's like that, you fall once, you fall twice, so what? Just get your ass up and get back on your feet again. =)

YAAAY! Friday's coming real soon! Going expedition again with Puang =D Happy happy happy! Hmms right now he's at some sci centre excursion for Gen Bio Mod. Sounds fun I wanna goooooooo hehe he agreed to hide me in his 70L bag AHAHHA damn sweet lah!

Healing Wounds

As long as you're willing, I'll be more than willing too.

On my way to healing a friendship that had been hurt...

There're some things and some friends you can never do without. You're one of those Chipz =)

For You I Will (Monica)

Yes, when you're feeling lost in the night
When you feel your world just ain't right
Call on me, I will be waiting
Count on me, I will be there

Anytime the times get too tough
Anytime your best ain't enough
I'll be the one to make it better
I'll be there to protect you, see you through
I'll be there, and there is nothing, I won't do

I will cross the ocean for you
I will go and bring you the moon
I will be your hero, your strength, anything you need
I will be the sun in your sky
I will light your way for all time, promise you
For you I will, yes yeah, yeah

I will shield your heart from the rain
I won't let no harm come your way
Oh, these arms will be your shelter
No, these arms won't let you down
If there is a mountain to move
I will move that mountain for you

I'm here for you, I'm here forever
I will be your fortress tall and strong
I'll keep you safe, I'll stand beside you right or wrong

Lay my life on the line, for you I will fight, oh
For you I will die, with every breath, with all my soul
I'll give my word, I'll give it all
Put your faith in me, put your faith in me
And I'll do anything...oh...


I will... oh...

This promise I made a year ago to someone I once loved...I haven't broken that promise.

I now make the same promise to you.

A promise which I've never broken and never will.

What I've said, I will do. I'll catch your fall, I'll cheer you on.

If there's only one thing you can trust to believe is true, trust in me that this is real.

LSM 1102 Lab

Next Mendel-in-making

Dear Debs..we're just wasting our time

Yeah this is what we were doing for 2 ENTIRE HOURS! Nilesh you idiot honestly just eff off back to India lah...blardy hell wasting my time AURGH!
Question : Can we change TAs ?!! Ive a tutorial ASS instead of tutorial Assistant

 

Jap Lunch with my Pseudo Jap aka Merlion aka GH at YIH

GH stealing my onions

Pause!!!

Lol never see people so happy with eating onions

 

Catching up with the rest of my life

Ahahaha top model? Err...lol =p

Dr Yeak! Ma sexy little doctorrr


Before


After...Ahahah me and Saf decided to throw it into the bushes..
couldn't be bothered
Singaporean educated overseas?? My ass lah. Where? Timbaktoo School of Picking Up Girls?
Sheesh did we not already have "Piss Off, we're not interested" written on our faces?
Stale pick-up lines. Try harder next time dude

 

OWWWW!

Ok lah at least I still have the least bit of common sense in me to trust my friends instead of the unfriendly school nurses, who don't let your friends come in and hold your hand when you're about to faint and DIE of PAIN and who accidentally PRESS on ur WOUND again.

Yeah so I put my trust in my dear ol Dr Wong! =D
Haha I already know the first 2 reactions that would come when you see me lah.

No.1 reaction : LAUGH LAUGH LAUGH
No.2 reaction : Asks about a certain someone

Lol haha anw thanks Saf!! *grinz* sorry I almost tore off your arm hee

Yaaay! Thanks MEEEEEEEEL!!!! Yaa stop laughing at me you sadistic bum! Try falling down in sucha pathetic way lah and you would have a toe-curling experience too. Bleahx...PAIN not PLEASURE =p

AURGH

Ahahaha so serious sia

SMILE!

Yeeeah nice nice waterproof dressing!

 

How Boring...

Aiii my Mona Lisa and Rainbow skies slept for almost the whole entire day ytd!!!

Haha Li was grounching that her Mona Lisa title kena given to someone else. Awww =p you can be my Mona Lisa number 2 darrrling!*muaCkz*

Have lab later at 3. Thought it was at 2pm heh luckily I called Debs first *grinz* yeeah free time WHEE! Ahhaha so with GH at YIH now wasting our time.

Lol damn funny lah he's motivation to master Game Theory was coz of this ONE example in his lecture notes :

"You broke up with your girl(boy) friend over a week ago. Should you call ahead or wait for her(his) call? What is the winning strategy?"

Lol what kinda dumb example is this sia...like that also caan.

GH: Wahlau ehh I'm soo gonna master this topic

Lol GH is a genuine idiot every single sentence also can crap something out =p

Aii heard that Death Note's a good movie. Wanna go watch tooo!*whines* No time no time. Damn sianz..Studying sucks...BOO Melon and Ben both wanna change major already!!! So SAAAD then cannot disturb them liao *SOBZ*

Speaking of which, just had a Org Chem test this morning. Haha all kena screwed alr. Sheesh halfway through I was thinking "Wahlau ehh..this mod supposed to be BASIC Organic Chemistry...like not very BASIC at all lah" BOOO

Anw...HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHIFUUUUUU!!!!
*grinz* May You stay pweeetty every single day! Bwahaha and stay blissfully attached to Lester eh =D LOVE YOU!!!

BEAUTIFUL IN MY EYES (Joshua Kadison)

You’re my piece of mind, in this crazy world
You’re every thing I've tried to find
Your love is a pearl
You’re my Mona Lisa
You’re my rainbow skies
And my only prayer is that you realize
You'll always be beautiful in my eyes...

The world will turn
And the seasons will change
And all the lessons we will learn
Will be beautiful and strange
We'll have our fell of tears
Our share of sight
My only prayer is that you realize
You'll always be beautiful in my eyes...

You will always be beautiful in my eyes
And the passing is the show
That you will always grow
Ever more beautiful in my eyes

And there are lines upon my face
From a life time of smiles
When the time comes to embrace
For one long last wine
We can laugh about how time really flies
We won’t say goodbye
‘Cause true love never dies
You'll always be beautiful in my eyes...

You will always be beautiful in my eyes
And the passing is the show
That you will always grow
Ever more beautiful in my eyes

The passing is the show
That you will always grow
Ever more beautiful in my eyes...

2000 Msges!!! Over 2000 memories....

Major deleting of msges from my hp. Fwahh over 2000 msges sianism

Deleted all 532 of Elv's msges...kept them for more than a year already...

Had been over Elv for awhile now but I've never gotten around to cleaning out my hp too. Duno why I suddenly wanted to do it but I did. Maybe coz this time I just really wanted to move on with the rest of my life already. No regrets. I didn't regret all that had happened. There were good memories, there were bad. What happened with Elv previously had been a significant part of my life...but those would just have to be kept as memories in my heart. It had been hard to let go...which explains why I've kept most of the msges from when we were just friends to best friends and to more than just friends.
But I'm letting go...what's over is over. No one can chase back time. (Bwahah Kwan you must be so prouda me)

"Time heals all wounds they say and I should know, coz it seems like forever but I'm letting you go"

Deleted a whole lot of other msges too. Flash backs to all that had happened a year ago.

Came across sad msges, bimbotic msges, and msges from friends just showing their concern.

"Sick ahhhhhhh sick ahhhhhhh..*cough cough* " Ahahah sounds familiar Mel ? Lol damn funny lah I started laughing at my hp when I saw your msg. Haha I can't even remember what it was for. Lol

Came across a whole lot of Jenn's msges too. *grinz* most of them were just too bimbotic couldn't bear to delete haha. JENNIFER LOW WHERE ARE YOOOOOU? Honestly gonna smack your boobs until no more caan!

"Wei, char boh. How are you man? You got miss me or not? Haha"
I miss Naz too. Her infectious laughter and the way she always calls me CHAR BOH! Lol and who can forget about the way she and Do gangs up to complain about certain people. I'm a neutral peace-loving person so I wasn't involved haha but it was hilarious =) Still remember the edible bra and undies we got for her on her last day haha damn funny. She being the horny ass that she is, bet she finished it on the first day of hols already haha.

And to my dearest slut Saf, I know things are really hard now, I've been through the same things before too and I was there with you before. It sucks. I know how much work that is, but hang in there babe! If you're tired, just take a break. Enjoy yourself. For those who love you, and for Ale, stay strong. I'll bring you icecream when I'm free ok? We'll sit out by the quay again =)

I miss Ravin too! My silly little baboon! Red bottom ass lah you, forever say wanna meet up with me then never waaan! Anwz really hope that everything's going well for you at home and with your silly little Shasha bear.

Kinda theraputic for me to clean out my msges. Wasn't there this chinese saying that goes "Jiu De Bu Qu, Xing De Bu Lai" Yah lah my cheena is damn horrendous but ehh I still know its SOMETHING likedat k so everyone DON'T LAUGH!

"What happens when memories are no longer true?"
"Create new ones" was Jon's answer to me when I was previously upset over Ming.

Yeaps...I'm setting out to create new ones. But the old ones will nevertheless stay in my heart.
Different people left different set of footprints in my life. It's never forgotten. And never will be.

HUI WEIGUANG! You're supposed to wake up an hr ago laaah...sleep like baby caan*POKE* haha don't care gonna disturb you NOW.

All You Have To Do Is Smile =)

Hehe*beamz* happy to wake up to your hugs! Stinky little pigg haha.

Lol felt so frustrated and was grouching to Puang at 4am ytd =p Ahahaha took up 100 mins of his talktime just ytd alone hehzz WHEE =D. He has his own silly way of cheering me up all the time. Lol what with making the grouch hovering around me have stomachache then leave me haha you're the best lah still can think of these nonsense at 4am lol. Haha super funny updating each other about the Puang and Owl lingo *Hugz*

Duno leh...haiz got frustrated coz I'm somehow held responsible for certain things which are not within my control. Most of the times its only when you've fallen too far to go back, then you realise what is happening. Sometimes just feel like giving up...Can I ? Haiz don't think I should though. Had hurt too many people along the way.

I miss Li BOOO miss kachiaoing her =p hee my personalised walking stick! Haha Chard is HOTTT don't argue with me LOL.

Aiii I need to go and swim soon...bahh what a great time to fall down =(

For You

Chipz...I know some things I might not have done them in the correct way and you probably hate me for that. But whatever it is, I'll still be here whenever you need me. I'll still be here the same way you were there for me. I'll still be here the same way I did for you in the past present and future. You haven't lost me...It hurts me to know that you're upset =( Its hard for everyone...but we all gotta take our own time to step outta things. So take your time ok? But please don't shut me out ok? This life needs you to be part of it. It wouldn't be the same without you *huGz*

*Beamz*

Hee its silly I know but its nice to be able to wake up to your voice =p even though if its nagging me to wake up haha. Sillyhead! How could I have eaten when I was SLEEPING!!! haha you crack me up lah. Mmm miss you =) Don't make me have to pry you down from the treehouse ok? Luckily I called you at the right time lah. I'm hungry..want some of your chicken wings!!! BOO

Missed going back to OUB. Not about the work part, but all the memories there =)
YES! JENNIFER LOW!!! I promised you to leave you a msg and this is my msg - If you don't start appearing soon, me and Saf gonna disown you liao =( but don't leh then our Bitch Bimbo Slut Club missing the Bimbo liao BLEAH. Ehh I went to see Sharipaah the other day, coz passing by haha

MELVYNNNNNN!!! =D Hehz yes a *BIG FAT KISS* to my sadistic saviour, who peeled off the guaze DAMN FAST without warning when I was talking on the phone! Baah almost gave me a heart attack caan. But yes thank you thank you thank you! Ahahah Dr Yeak say I always come back coz I miss you HMM let me think about that MUAHAHA

And to my Slut (muahaha nuff said, don't even need to mention your name =p ) had a great time catching up with you, dissing the California Fitness guy, pretending we were lesbians AHAHAH. Dunno leh everytime I go back, really miss our silly moments together *winks* You're a big big part of me which I won't ever let go! *HUGZ*

Ok think I'll most prob go for Aini's open house next wk =) Aiii haha unlike Mel it's not just for the FOOD *grinz*

Happy Or Sad

Happy Sad Happy Sad...when can I stop this rollercoaster ride of emotions?

Sometimes...It's my own life...I just want to run it myself...then again if it's my life, why can't I seem to control it? &*^!*&$^* Irritated...feel like grouching at everyone now. Bleahx Li take bus down to my place lah let me grouch at you =p PGP so near only ...

Bleahx I've never been this way before...my mood swings are really coming and going damn fast..even I am getting annoyed with myself..hurrs I'm damn sorry for people around me who have to see my pek chek grouchy face, my damn sad hurt puppydog face and also my swooning lovesick face =p AHAHAHA ie I'm damn sorry for you LI !!!! *grinz* haha but its damn funny how we understand each other by just one look of the face. Idiot haha you already know what's gonna set me off lah still happily like to irritate me *kicks..with the other leg* Lols but today was damn funny.

Haiz yaa I know I know...I'm getting gastritis again...No appetite then don't eat laaah force me also no use right. Haiz but yes..I know I better start having regular meals already. BAAH

Scared about tmr coz you won't be with me =( BOOO!

Fineee I'm being damn whiny...So WHAT..I like cannot MEH

=)

*beamz*even if it was a really short while, at least I got to see you and know that you're ok =) Puang!!! Don't go up the treehouse! I'll pry you out ok =(

Haha had a uber long girltalk with Li just now =p Ya lah its nice knowing you have a good friend to talk crap and to talk about serious stuff. LISA CHAN YU LIN! Bitch, almost make me fall down again just now bleahx still can happily laugh hurr hurr

Haiz fine...I need to stop myself from being too dependent on you

Heez

Mel!!! Ehh can help me do dressing not arh? Baah dun really trust the school nurses leh =p Hehz I'll make sure I'll write about how NICEEEEEE you are ok? haha

=)

*Hugz* as long as you're here...a lot of things doesn't really matter to me anymore. I don't want to know so don't tell me.

Haha it's damn funny to bicker with Puang =p BOO but I always give in to you haha

Miss You

To a certain sleeping baby =) At least I know you're not up the treehouse heh

I'll Wait

Things are just too complicated now. Just so many uncertainties that I don't want to think about.

Thank You. For still being here, for not letting me go, for telling me you'll be strong for me, and leaving me to my choice...

2 weeks ago I wasn't sure, I really wasn't. I couldn't be sure where my heart was or whether this was what I really wanted. How could it be when I had previously told myself it couldn't be?So many things were happening all at the same time. That's why the only person I could trust my incoherent thoughts with was Li.

But now I know what I want and it's everything that you can give to me. There's just a nggging feeling telling me this time, it's different. This time, don't let it go. So I'm going to wait...wait till things are less complicated...wait till you know what you want.

Thank You for letting me be. For letting me hold on to the very last thing I can before I fall. This hope is fragile but nevertheless I'll cling on to it.

Didn't want to wake up today. Didn't want to remember all that happened ytd. Didn't know what to expect today. So I sank. I went up to the treehouse for a peek and I told Puang...coz we promised each other we would whenever we went there.

"If you go up there, I'll go up to the treehouse to find you you know. Don't leave me too" =)

"If you're not there, I won't anyhow go up the treehouse"

Happy for your morning msg. Somehow telling me that things will still be the same.

Amidst all of it, you didn't give up on me. When I wanted so much to leave, you didn't let me. You continued to stay strong as my pillar of strength. And as usual, as long as you're still here with me, as long as you're happy, I'll be happy.

Li, don't be mad at me ok? I didn't mean to shut you out ytd...just needed sometime alone. Its a road no one can walk with me. But thankyou for being there all the while. Bleahx you should forgive me since I forgave you for being cranky ytd and laughing at my bandaged knee hurmph *HUGZ* you know I love you!!!! Yes..Happy or not I still wanna watch the chick flicks hehe

Pam thx for asking ytd...and leaving me be. Heh and thx for rushing down with the flip-flops too!

Pau thx for asking abt the knee, ya lah next time I shall stop thinking about you lol. I still salute you for being able to wake up at 7am sheesh. Haha your lame msg came at a very right time.

Elvis Chong Ying Ming! Still dare say lah! Come back also never tell wan! Come down Uni oso never msg STILL CAN LAUGH AT ME! Only know how to look at Nana! Idiot haha but glad you're back safe and not half dead. See! You made it! Now you gotta treat me! Muahaha

And...there's someone else I need to say sorry to...haiz

Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough
(Patti Smyth and Don Henley)

Now, I don't want to lose you, but I don't want to use you
just to have somebody by my side.
And I don't want to hate you,
I don't want to take you, but I don't want to be the one to cry.

And that don't really matter to anyone anymore.
But like a fool I keep losing my place
and I keep seeing you walk through that door.

(Chorus)

But there's a danger in loving somebody too much,
and it's sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust.
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are.
Baby, sometimes, love just aint enough.

Now, I could never change you, I don't want to blame you.
Baby, you don't have to take the fall.
Yes, I may have hurt you, but I did not desert you.
Maybe I just want to have it all.

It makes a sound like thunder, it makes me feel like rain.
And like a fool who will never see the truth,
I keep thinking something's gonna change.

(Chorus)

And there's no way home, when it's late at night and you're all alone.
Are there things that you wanted to say?
And do you feel me beside you in your bed,
there beside you, where I used to lay?

And there's a danger in loving somebody too much,
and it's sad when you know it's your heart they can't touch.
There's a reason why people don't stay who they are.
Baby, sometimes, love just ain't enough.

Baby, sometimes, love... it just ain't enough.
Oh, Oh, Oh, No.

Is this it?

Is this how its gonna fall apart every single time? It had happened with Elv didn't it? Because I was honest with my feelings, it had broken us apart. We're back as friends yet that one part of us had been lost and gone forever. No amount of assurance can make me sure that it won't be the same for you.

Have you ever lost someone you love. Yet the person tells you he's not gonna let you go but at the same time you still feel like you've lost him?

Does it even make sense?

What's the point of trying?

Everytime I'm letting go, giving up, closing up, a nagging feeling always tells me to do what I believe in. "You're entitled to your own feelings, so always be true to them" A principle I stuck to despite all the things that had happened. I just wanna be honest to myself and to people around me. But how can I say its a good principle to stick to when it hurts me every single time. Every single time...

I know its unfair to you and its unfair to say that I'm losing you coz you said that you'll still be here for me. You've never let me down and I know that I can still trust you. Maybe its me. Then again, it IS me. I'm not losing you, I'm losing myself...

I know it's wrong but I feel like drinking and dancing again...I feel like losing myself again

How am I Supposed to Live Without You
(Micheal Bolton)

I could hardly believe it
When I heard the news today
I had to come and get it straight from you
They said you were leavin'
Someone swept you heart away
From the look upon your face I see it's true
So tell me all about it, tell me 'bout the plans you're makin'
Then tell me one thing more before I go

Tell me how am I supposed to live without you
Now that I've been lovin' you so long
How am I supposed to live without you
How am I supposed to carry on
When all that I've been livin' for is gone

I didn't come here for cryin'
Didn't come here to breakdown
It's just a dream of mine is coming to an end
And how can I blame you
When I built my world around
The hope that someday we'd be so much more than friends
And I don't wanna know the price I'm gonna pay for dreaming
When even now it's more than I can take

And I don't wanna face the price I'm gonna pay for dreaming
Now that your dream has come true

How do you tell yourself not to fall for someone who cared so much about you?
How do you tell yourself not to fall for someone who sees so much more in you than yourself?
How do you tell yourself not to fall for that one person who never fails to make you smile?
How do you tell yourself not to fall for that person who always agrees to do the silliest things with you?
How do you tell yourself not to fall for the person who makes you feel like the most special person in the world at your lowest point, grouchiest and most chaa chard moods?

When I was bleeding today, it hurt so bad. I know you rushed down after receiving my call. It didn't hurt anymore coz I had you beside me. Coz I had you to hold my hand. Coz I had you to let me bite your hand when I was in pain. Coz I had you to hug me to make me feel better.

Then during the treatment, it hurt again coz you couldn't come in with me, you weren't there beside me, you weren't there to hold my hand, you weren't there to let me bite your hand, you weren't there to hug me to make me feel better.

Everything that had seemed so wrong, begin to seem so right. Yet now is so wrong. It's not your fault so don't go blaming yourself. It's mine. I tried to stop I really did. But in the end I let myself continue to fall. I hate myself. Hate myself for doing this. Hate hate hate hate hate hate hate!

I know you're not letting me go. Neither do I wanna let go of you. I don't want to wake up to that horrible feeling that you're gone from me, the one thing I fear the most. I can't imagine not seeing you again. Yet I don't have the courage to see you now. Don't want to avoid you coz I don't wanna break that promise I made to you. Yet dunno if I'm strong enough to handle it.

I need you to be a part of this life.

All I know is I miss you now.

All I know is I wanna see you now

All I know is I wanna hear your voice now

All I know is I wanna see your smile now


I'm sorry Li...this time I'm sinking...I'm shutting everyone out. Just let me go...

SO HAPPPPPPPPY!!!!!

WELCOME BACK PUANG!!!! *HUGZ* Can't express the feeling that I'm having right now. Just SO SO SO SO SOOOOO HAPPY!!! *dances* =D

Tomorrow came! Was going to do a countdown for Puang but...

11.58pm : Owl..decided..I'm going to mug mug mug *hugz*

=D So happy so happy so happy! Puang's back and decided to fight the battle alongside all of us. Decided not to avoid his problems =)

You said that you're always here, but it wouldn't have been the same! You didn't realise but for the whole of today while you were deciding, you were just so far away even as we kept in contact throughout the day. If at 12am you had decided you were going to forfeit, I would have sank. Sank coz you wouldn't be alongside me anymore, coz you would be leaving me behind and I would have to leave you behind. Bleahx..It wouldn't have been the same fighting without you!

Why am I happy? Coz I truly saw the whole 360 deg change in you! So happy that you snapped outta it. I could feel the strong fighting spirit that you had when you msged me. Grab on to it Puang! Don't let go! We'll do this together! *HUGZ*All the way till 5th dec! I'll stay with you! =)

BURN BURN BURN!!!

Lolz...I missed fighting with Gene AHAHAHA =p Shuddup lah Bak Gua else I BURN you! Hehzz

BAK GUA! You're my MU GUA!

Me: AHHHHH Aurgh how how how? dun understand how they draw the dumb dumb structureeeee!!!
Puang : the chair and boat?
Me: HUH?! What chair what boat!!!

Lol I'm like how dead lah...ok promised Puang I'll teach him the dumb chair and boat theory after I understand AHHH which means I better understand quickly. Die die die! Someone up there HEEEEELP!

*grinz* GENEEEEEEE!!!! Haha I almost forgot about my dear ol GENEEEEEE Yeo Bak Gua! =D hehe aww missed you too! Come to think of it I haven't seen you for so damn long lah! Ok yes I'm gonna kena scolded for not going to church =p Haha but yes no matter how many times I tell you to burn hehe you know I don't really want you to hehzz or else no one to let me disturb and be disturbed AHAHAH. Thx your damn dumb msgs came at the right time when I was bored =D

Ok Puang gonna beat backside already haha gtg back and mug BOO

Let Time Fly...

If that's the case, please let tomorrow come quickly =) so you can fight the battle alongside me!


 

=)

Hehz ok that was a fast dip. *grinz* Puang cheered me up already. I think we're infecting each other like crazy. Haha like a "see-saw" he says. He sinks, I sink. He rises, I rise too. Sheesh Puang I think we need to find equilibrium already. Then we'll BOTH be happy! =) WHEE. I know I'm not supposed to say this but...fight this battle with me ok? =D Don't smack me. *Hugz*

Anw HUI WEIGUANG! Please go buy some food caan you can't survive on bread alone. It's only for fishes. And since you're not supposed to be sinking now, it's not for you! GO AND EAT!

I'll fight

Hmms I know it's silly but I get the feeling of being left behind if Puang forfeits. Like we're not fighting the same battle anymore. I'll feel left behind by him and at the same time leaving him behind. I don't want either.

I'm fed-up. Fed-up with what you said. I don't wanna hear those things. Don't want don't want don't want! It always comes back to the same issue which is making me more scared than ever. *SCREAMZ*

Haiz Li told me I gotta be strong. If I break down too..nobody would be able to reach the both of us.

There's just so many uncertainties which I hate...

I've seen more than my share of promises which have been broken and it makes me scared. Promises..they're just words aren't they? It brings me back to all that had happened with Elv and Ming...scars which I hate to remember.

Don't push me away. Please don't. Don't be afraid that you will, because I won't leave. I don't know if I'm strong enough to fight it but I will try my very best. If that day ever comes...I'll fight to come back. I'll fight to come back...

My leg is attached to so many burdens now I feel like I'm just gonna drown. I wanna break free but can't. I don't know how.

Don't tell me to cheer up...coz right now, I just can't...

Footprints

One night a man had a dream

He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord

Across the sky flashed scenes from his life

Foe each scene he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand :

one belonging to him and the other to the Lord

He noticed that many times there was only one set of footprints

He asked the Lord,

" You said that once I decided to follow you, you would walk with me all the way.

Why did you leave me when I needed you the most? "

The Lord whispered back,

" I love you and will never leave you. When you saw only one set of footprints,

those were the times I was carrying you "

Its suprising how He provides with the most comforting things when I'm at my lowest. Somehow constantly reminding me that He'll always be right there beside me wherever I go, whenever I need him, He's just a prayer away. Was looking for post-its in my cupboard when I saw this. It immediately comforted me. My thoughts and feelings like a rollercoaster ride in a hurricane storm were calmed.

Thank You Lord, You're my refuge and strength in times of need. I'll leave it all up to You.

Fear

Was mugging for CM1121 halfway...then out of nowhere fear engulfed me...

It sucks because I've been through all that before...and I know what might happen...all the possibilities played in my mind...

Never been so scared to lose someone before...

I don't want to lose you

PEEL PEEL PEEEEEEL!

EEEYUH! PAU! All your fault!!! My hands are peeling like mad lah machiam like kena sunburn lykdat =( all coz of the detergent that day! *SOBZ* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH it's so UGLY!!!!

Haiz

Was determined to start my day happy...and then I went to torture myself by seeing what you wrote the last time. There's a stone tied to my feet that's pulling me down. I dunno...guess I'll continue crying on the inside...reason? Coz I know that those words may never be meant for me...and it hurts so so bad...

BITE

Hehe Puang let me bite =D BITE BITE BITE!
Hee miss you already. Tomorrow's a holiday but you cannot go on holiday also ok? You must stay here with me! Here here here! So I can BITE =D Hehe

Broken

Do you know what heart-wrenching is?

It is when I see you sinking in front of me
It is when I couldn't do anything to help you, to make you feel better
It is when I can't seem to reach out to you, to where you're going
It is when I'm so scared that you'll leave me

Time ticked away and I was worried about you. I didn't leave the whole time coz I knew you would need someone when you came out. And the moment I saw you come out, I was so glad that I was there...so glad that at least someone was there for you. But it tore me apart to see you like that. It tore me apart when the first thing you said was not to leave you. And if that hug could make you feel better, I would have held you forever. A part of me didn't wanna let go, wanted to protect you and let you know that everything's gonna be alright

Everything is gonna be alright

I didn't know how to stop you so I held your hand hoping that by that you could take me there too. Hoping that you wouldn't shut me out.

Broken. Held my tears till I got to Forum. Hugged Li the moment I saw her and let my tears flow, flow ,flow , flow, flow, flow. Li, you're a life saviour. It doesn't matter that you didn't know what to say or whether what you said was right or wrong, it just mattered to me that you were there by my side to hold me.

Whatever happens, wherever it is, even if its to the very depths of it all, bring me along coz I don't want you to be alone. I won't leave you, that's the very last thing I'll do. This is a promise I make to you.

Think about it alright...I was against the idea at first, but I don't want you to be stressed coz of it. And after how I saw you today, all I want is for you to be happy. So whatever your decision, you don't have to ask me already coz I will stand by you. Haha don't worry coz I'll accompany you for the last half of the year.

=) and now I'm happy coz you're happy alr! Hee welcome home from your dip! *HUGZ* Haha and you're happy coz I'm happy? Will you stay happy coz I am? If you will then I'll stay happy for you =)

When I See You Smile

(Bad English)

Sometimes I wonder how I'd ever make it through
Through this world without having you, I just wouldn't have a clue
'Cos sometimes it seems like this world's closing in on me
And there's no way of breaking free, and then I see you reach for me

Sometimes I wanna give up, I wanna give in, I wanna quit the fight
And then I see you baby, and everything's alright, everything's alright

When I see you smile, I can face the world, oh oh, you know I can do anything
When I see you smile, I see a ray of light, oh oh
I see it shining right thru the rain
When I see you smile, baby when I see you smile at me

Baby there's nothing in this world that could ever do
What a touch of your hand can do, it's like nothing that I ever knew

And when the rain is falling, I don't feel it, 'cos you're here with me now
And one look at you baby, is all I'll ever need, it's all I'll ever need

When I see you smile, I can face the world, oh oh, you know I can do anything
When I see you smile, I see a ray of light, oh oh
I see it shining right thru the rain
When I see you smile, baby, baby when I see you smile at me

Sometimes I wanna give up, I wanna give in, I wanna quit the fight
Then one look at you baby, and everything's alright, everything's alright
So right

(Instrumental break)

When I see you smile, I can face the world, oh oh, you know I can do anything
When I see you smile, I see a ray of light, oh oh
I see it shining right thru the rain, yeah
When I see you smile, I can face the world, oh oh, you know I can do anything
When I see you smile, oh yeah, baby when I see you smile, smile at me

Smells like puke

Too tired to blog ytd. *grinz* ytd night was damn fun though...damnit got even more dirty than Jenn and Mel's bdae party at Indochine (yess..Jenn actually started a cake fight at Indochine!!! omg) Lol Pau was damn funny lah we didn't even think of throwing the detergent water from the 2nd floor until he kept being suspicious and kept looking up AHAHHA so in other words, he killed himself *grinz* So Jerome went up to the 2nd floor to prepare for attack. Hehe

Lol our props for the night - detergent, water, powder, cake, and even more detergent. EEEYUH! Wahlau ehh kena chased all around TH ...damnit thought I was at a safe distance I was damn clean caan until stupid Hansel came up behind and drowned me in detergent!!!!

*grinz*we were supposed to be washing up but then me and Pam started splashing Bobo in the toilet AHAHAHA so we had a water fight in the guys toilet lol DAMN FUNNY! Gross manz..completely wet from head to toe...yucks. Ahahah Darrel was damn funny lah trying to REASON his way outta not getting dirty. Haha you should have known it doesn't work =p

The night had been really fun though...having all my friends around me...having so much fun running around and attacking Bobo that for a moment I almost forgot about what I had on my mind, what was going on within me.

But as usual..it was only for a moment...

Happy Pau-day to YOOOU!

To my dearest favouritist Willie Lau the PAU Happy 22nd Birthday!!! =D hehz hope you enjoyed your night! haha don't hate us ok coz WE LOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOU! haha

the most precious pic of all!!!
Pau getting soaked with detergent water!!!*grinz*

 

 

presenting Pau with his bdae paus


*grinz*


ehh you should be looking happy!


Ahahah the shirt we got him...suits him eh? Little Bastard Records lol

 

Pau with his pau


Happy Pau-day to you!

 

Hansel Ho!!! You're soo gonna die lah..still splashing me with powder!*growls*


lol an unsuspecting Willie still happily eating cake *grin*


cleaning up


Thou shall kill Willie even though it's his birthday

 

Ahahah presenting the complete cast of evil society organised for Pau's Birthday

Willie the Pau


Pam


ME!!!


Bobo