I declare today a horrible sad black friday =( *sobz* coz Ahgong just flew awayyyy...MILESSSS AWAYYYYY to Zurich *bawls* 5 mths seems to be forever. July seems like it'll never ever come =( Broke down right after he entered the departure gates =( I'm so glad for Dips, Vin, Janice, Roopesh, Junwei, the whole bunch who are gonna keep me sane in this period. Something else which made me all the more realise how much i appreciate them, they are not complicated. They helped shift my life back into normal mode when i'm at the lowest. Fuck it with the previous life I had. I'm never going back.

I realise God's grace through this...how He never closes one door without opening another. Hearing about Dips "friends" leaving him after the breakup sounded so familiar to me. But we came to this conclusion to just fuck it ...we don't need them if they can't go through shit with us. All the bullshit about 'i can't be friends with you coz i'm the used-to-be other half's friend first'. And how they give up on you or just don't make the effort at all to meet up or even contact anymore.

"We're all here for you" was something that was told to me constantly by this bunch of friends...something that was never said to me by them . What was told to me was
"I'm in a difficult position"
"there wouldn't be smoke without fire"
"i don't like to get myself involved in all these"

I can't get it outta my mind. I tried and tried but I just can't. It hurts the most when it comes from that person you've learnt to trust after sucha long while. I was there when you all needed me...24/7 i was there. But slowly you guys gave me up. I've given up trying. I'm letting you all go coz you first let me go. I won't hold on to you...i'll rather walk away....

ANW...photos coming upppp! =)

AND last but not least

To Ahgong :

"Holding On For You" (Liberty X)

Sunshine fades to gray
The second I'm away
Minutes turn to hours
Without you
Time keeps marching on
Now summers been and gone
And I'm still here alone
Still waiting.

I'm on my own
A million miles away
Temptation all around
I won't be long
So please be strong
Cos I'm holding on for you

Trust is all it takes
But people make mistakes
Cos we are only human
Lets face it
I struggle through the day
Pretend that I'm okay
I make believe that you're here
Beside me

I'm on my own
A million miles away
Temptation all around
I won't be long
So please be strong
Cos I'm holding on for you

You are the only one that I truly believe in
So don't ever think that I would ever deceive you baby
Without a doubt you are my rhyme and my reason
And I won't let you down